E-Mazing Eights: New Years Resolutions

Happy 2009 from LA. I went across the US and back, slept in airports, lost luggage over twice in one trip and shoveled over 3 feet of snow. My Renegade Reports have consisted of page long letters to every airline under the son: Northwest, United, Southwest, you name it and I've flied and been left somewhere.

I made it back to Southern California, where it's always sunny, well almost always.

We've all stuffed our face, drank our faces off, and now have to face our fears. It's time for the Annual New Years Resolution. Our favorite yearly commitment that we keep for a week at most. Let's try to at least make it a month. We've heard them all year after year: gym, lose weight, save money, and be less boring for God's sake.

Now it's time for Renegade Reporting's E-Mazing Eight New Years Resolutions.

8. Save Money: Eliminate one adult website subscription per month

7. Lose Weight: Eat scrapple instead of bacon

6. Better Hygiene: Floss my teeth after corn on the cob, use toothpick after oreo's.

5. Raise Morals: Regift all gifts, instead of returning w/o receipts, Macy's need a proof of purchase! :(

4. Go Green: Use a towel instead of toilette paper.

3. Stay in Touch: Touch whatever and whenever I want.

2. Exercise: Run when being chased from cops, dump car on corner.

1. Keep my Word: When itching to say "Word Up!", just drop the official slang son, "Raise Up!".

Stay Tuned.

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